Rhythm pulses through her veins. Melodies fill her brain. Her days are filled with music and dancing. A day without dancing isn’t a day worth living as far as she is concerned. She is a musical soul.

Dancing to her favorite Dragon song

There isn’t any one type of music that she gravitates towards, although a good beat does seems to help. The only requirement for making the list is that the song speaks to her and makes her want to dance. If she can’t not dance to a song it will become an instant favorite and very quickly makes its way onto her iPod. Her favorites range from Gwen Stefani’s The Sweet Escape, to Adele’s Rolling in the Deep, to Forbidden Friendship from the How to Train Your Dragon Soundtrack, to OneRepublic’s All the Right Moves, to Led Zeppelin’s Bron-Y-Aur Stomp, to Eminem’s Like Toy Soldiers.

Her musical tastes are beautifully eclectic. And, there is just no swaying her opinion, no matter how hard her daddy tries You can’t convince her she doesn’t like a song once she has developed a taste for it and you can’t convince her that she likes a song that hasn’t spoken to her. She usually knows the very first time she hears a song whether it is a keeper or not. There is no telling what her next favorite is going to be either, she will hear a song on the radio or in a movie or something, it makes her want to dance and is an instant new favorite.

I love her love for music. I love how she sings to her self a random times throughout the day and will just start dancing to some tune playing in her head. I’m pretty sure there is always a song playing in her head.

Our pets are a part of our family. Often times they are our babies before we have actual babies. They are often our children’s first friend, and the bond they form together is a strong and beautiful one. Sadly, a child’s first experience with loss often comes when the family pet dies. Talking to your children about the loss of their beloved friend can be difficult, especially when your child is experiencing death and grief for the first time. The age of the child is going to play a big role in how they perceive the loss, handle the grief and how best to talk to them about the death of a pet.

With two aging kitties in our household, age 14 and 13, and a little girl who grows increasingly attached to her kitty buddies every day, this is a topic I have worried about, researched and considered quite a bit. Last week one of our kitties became very ill and at one point it was looking like the end may be very near. Luckily, her condition has improved and it looks like she’ll be around for a little bit longer. As I was back and forth to the vet and busy administering the medication necessary to hopefully improve Miss Laura’s condition I couldn’t stop thinking about how I was going to talk to Maya about all of it. I tried to play over the conversations in my head many times. We talked to her about the fact that Laura was very sick but I didn’t mention the “D” word because I didn’t want to unnecessarily worry her until we knew for sure what was going on.  I did, however, do a lot of research so I would be a little more prepared if/when the time comes.

How a child handles the loss of their pet friend is going to vary, just as how we adults handle loss varies. Some children may not appear to be affected and carry on much as usual, this is particularly true for children too young to really understand death. It is normal for children to cry, have changes in mood, appetite, and behavior after the loss of a pet. It is normal for children to ask a lot of questions and even sometimes wonder if something they did caused their pet to die. Children don’t generally understand the permanence of death until around age 7 or so and children younger than that may continue to ask when the pet is going to come back. The most important thing you can do for your child as they grieve for their pet friend is to be there for them, to cuddle with them, talk to them and listen to them. Talking about how they feel and letting them ask as many questions as they need to is very important.

One of the big worries for many parents is how best to explain death and what happens after a pet dies. How to talk to your child about this is going to depend on their age and your beliefs. The best thing you can do is tailor your conversations to your child’s age and understanding of death and to your beliefs as a family. Your child’s questions will be a big help in determining what they understand will help lead the conversation in a good direction for them.

I found several websites in my research last week that provide great information about how children display and deal with grief and how best to help them through their grief.

•  The Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement
• The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry 
• Family Corner.com

In a couple of weeks Maya will be going on her very first field trip. Her little preschool class is taking a trip to the pumpkin patch. They get to ride on a bus and everything!

At her school the teacher to child ratio is great. There are 9 kids in her class and 3 teachers. Two of the classes are pairing up for the trip so there will be 18 kids and 6 teachers plus one of the assistant principals is tagging along and the OT that works with one of the kids in Maya’s class. So, given that so many adults will be there they didn’t ask for parent volunteers to be extra eyes. Parents are, however, invited to tag along if they want.

I want to, I would love to be part of this little experience. But. Ya, there’s a but. But, I’m worried that my being there will mean that Maya’s experience isn’t as a great as it could be. You see, Maya is very shy. When we had our parent/teacher conference a few weeks ago it was one of the topics we discussed. I wasn’t surprised that her teacher had noticed it, since we witness it every time we are out with friends, or Maya encounters strangers and even acquaintances while we are out and about.  She is super shy around other people and it takes time for her to warm up and talk to people. Her teacher has mentioned that she is starting to see her come out of her shell, she is starting to communicate with her friends and the teachers more and more. So, I’m worried that my being there with her on the field trip will limit her, that she will use me as a shield and won’t be as open, as talkative, as adventurous.

As much as I want to go, to be part of this little adventure with her, I’m leaning towards sitting this one out. I haven’t made a firm decision yet, but I want her to have the best first field trip experience possible and if that means I have to sit this one out than that is what I will do.

Any of you other mommas of shy kiddos had a similar experience? Any advice for me?

This month, around our house, is going to be all about routine change. In less than three weeks Maya starts preschool (still can’t quite believe it). With the start of preschool comes the need for a few bad habits to be changed around here and the need for a new quick, manageable morning routine that will allow us to get out the door in time for school drop off.

When I signed Maya up for preschool last fall she was definitely a morning person. She was consistently waking up between 6:30am and 7:00am every morning. The morning was her most cheerful time and she was still napping most days in the afternoon. So, given what our routine at the time was I figured morning preschool would be the best for her. When we found out, in May, about our Tuesday/Thursday morning spot opening up for the new school year I started to regret my decision to go with mornings, but it was too late. A lot has changed in our lives and in Maya routine since last fall when I first added her to the wait list. She no longer gets up as early. Some mornings she sleeps until 8am or so and it takes her forever to get going in the morning. Plus, she is no longer napping in the afternoons.  Not to mention, of course, I now have a newborn to get ready to go in the morning too. But, since no afternoon spots were available, we’re just going to have to make it work. I foresee some crazy frantic mornings in our future while we adjust.

In order to control the chaos that will be the first few weeks of school as we adjust to the new schedule I am implementing a few routine changes around here over the next few weeks.

The first big change is how and where we eat breakfast. Maya has never been a fan of eating as soon as she gets up, she would rather play for a bit. And, we have developed this nasty habit of eating in the family room so she can play/watch television while she eats. I admit this is totally my fault, I should never have started this bad habit in the first place. It was just easy because it allowed her to eat breakfast at her own pace and play at the same time. However, now we won’t have time for that on school days. So, we are starting a new routine of eating breakfast as soon as we get up at the dining room table. This morning was our first go and it went pretty well. She only ate about half her breakfast before claiming she was full and getting down to go play. It didn’t take long before she was hungry and asking for snacks though. It’ll get better I’m sure. Hopefully, by the time August 18th rolls around she’ll be eating all her breakfast, quickly, at the table every morning.

Next week our big routine adjustment is going to be wake up time. Lorne gets up every morning around 6:00am (ish) to get ready for work. My plan is to get up at the same time and shower and then wake Maya up around 6:30am to get our day started. I want to make sure we have plenty of time in the mornings so that we aren’t too rushed. At first I’ll make her do this every day so she gets used to it. Over time, as she adjusts to the school days schedule, I’ll let her return to waking on her own on non-school days.

The wrench in all of this, the unknown, is Anna and when she is going to want to eat. But, we’ll just have to take that as it comes and hopefully I’ll be able to get her into a good routine that works around Maya’s school schedule.

It’ll all work out, I just have to keep telling myself that.

When I think about the words I would use to describe my sweet little girl right now, at the age of 3 and a half (+), this picture captures them all. She is full of life, loves to joke and make people laugh, and has a smile that could light up any room and any heart.

It is hard to sum up all that is Maya right now, all the tiny parts that make up who she is. She is definitely a stubborn (very stubborn), independent 3 year old. She is opinionated and strong willed and can battle with the best of them to get what she wants. She is also full of life and giggles and has more energy than anyone I’ve ever met. She loves to entertain us by dancing and singing and doing things she finds funny. If she is doing something that she thinks deserves applause she will tell you to clap. If she is doing something that she finds funny she will tell you to laugh (even if she has done it a million times and it has long since lost its humor).

In a couple of months, a little less actually, she’ll be starting preschool. She is ready in so many ways for this next big adventure. I can’t wait to see what she learns, and how she grows from this new adventure. One of her favorite games to play right now is school. She sets up all her guys in her bedroom, which she calls her very special library, and declares herself the teacher. She teaches her guys new things and reads to them, it is adorable to watch.

But, before she starts school, an even bigger change is coming for Maya. She is about to become a big sister. Her little family, the family she has known her whole life is about to change. Her little world is about to be turned upside down. The transition will be made so much easier since she is so excited about becoming a big sister and really looking forward finally getting to meet her baby sister. I know there will be some struggles, but we’ll handle those as they come. She has so much to give as a big sister and will be an amazing big sister.

I love all the little parts that make up this sweet little girl, even the parts that make me want to pull my hair out sometimes. I’ve watched her change and grow and become who she is today over the last 3 plus years and I’m looking forward to continuing to watch her grow and change. She is one amazing little girl and I’m so glad I get to call her my daughter.

Love you bunches sweet baby girl.

So far Maya is having a wonderful time here in Australia.  She is keeping busy.  She has loved all our little adventures so far and has a bunch of her toys with her to keep her occupied when we are just hanging out in the apartment.  Jetlag hit her pretty hard the first few days but she seems to have recovered nicely from that.  But, as much fun as she is having and as much as she likes it here, she seems to be a little bit homesick

The very first day we got here she told me she was going to pretend that the kitty neck pillow we got her for the plane was Lily (one of our cats) since the real Lily wasn’t in Australia with us.  Then, over the last few days, several times, she has talked about how much she misses the kitties and how she really wants to give them a both a big hug.  Yesterday, when we were hanging out on the balcony after her nap she told me one of the screws in the glass door was a magic button that would turn our Australia house into our green house (our house in St. Louis) and then she could go inside and find Lily and Laura. She searched every where and then asked why she couldn’t find them. Broke my heart.  Luckily, our house sitter emailed a couple of photos of the kitties the other day, that made Maya really happy.

Not only does she talk a lot about how much she misses our house and her kitties and the toys she left at home but she also talks a lot about her little friend, Claire, and how much she misses her.  Everyday she uses her toy phone to call Claire and tell her all about what we are doing.  Yesterday she called Claire’s mom, Heather, and told her that they should ride on an airplane and come stay at our Australia house (I love that she calls it that!).  We usually have a play date once a week with Heather and Claire so it is a big deal for her to go so long without seeing and playing with her friends.

Luckily, her little bout of homesickness hasn’t resulted in any crying, but it is heartbreaking to know how much she misses her kitties and her friends.  I’m sure she is just adjusting to all the changes and the difference in her environment, but it is still hard.  Hopefully by keeping her busy with lots of fun activities here and continuing to talk to her about what she is feeling the homesickness won’t get too bad.

There is nothing quite like living through the imagination of a child. Seeing the world through eyes that are not yet tainted with limitations.  Seeing a world where anything, truly anything, is possible.

Maya is full on into imagination mode.  And, I”m loving it.  The games and adventures she creates for herself everyday are priceless. Sometimes I find myself standing quietly in the dining room trying not to let her know I’m there just so I can peak through the doorway into the family room and just watch her imagination run wild.  Sometimes I sit down next to her and become part of the little world she has created.  The world outside seems like a brighter, nicer, more joyful place in those moments.

Some days she uses her imagination to create stories. She’ll either pick up one of her books and create a story to go along with the pictures or she’ll even pick up one of my novels, study the cover and then “read” through the pages and pages of no pictures creating a story as she goes along.  Some days it is endless parties, tea parties, birthday parties, any kind of party you can imagine. She’ll take her my little ponies, her princesses, her stuffed sesame street guys and arrange them all and then serve them tea or have them dance.  Some days she’ll pretend she is camping. Some days she’ll be all about families and she’ll create little families that have fun and take care of each other. She always tells me who is who.  Yesterday Eeyore was the daddy, her big Minnie Mouse was the mommy and her little Minnie Mouse was the Maya!

Every day is different when you use your imagination. Each morning when Maya wakes up and comes into the family room she enters a different imaginary world.  I love watching as the world unfolds and the days adventures begin.

3 year olds may be little people but they sure do have big imaginations.

Let me just start by saying that having to parent with tough love sucks.

Today was gymnastics class day.  The first class of the new semester.  A chance for Maya to start out fresh and actually try to go into the class by herself.  After last week’s struggle Lorne and I discussed that it was time to exercise some tough love and make her go into class on her own.

Throughout last semester of gym class I had to go into gym class with Maya (it is supposed to be an independent, parent free class).  She would sit on my lap by the door and refused to participate for the first 10-15 minutes of class.  Eventually she would make her way over to join her class as she saw how much fun they were having.  Shortly there after I could leave the room and she barely noticed I wasn’t there.  It worked out well but we felt like she needed to try to do it on her own.  We felt that not encouraging her to overcome her shyness was not helping her.

So, for the last few days we have been talking to her about being shy and nervous and how it’s okay to be shy and nervous but that she should try to fight through it and not let it her stop her from trying new things.  We talked about how important it was for her to try doing new things on her own, like going into gym class all by herself.  And this morning, as we drove to gymnastics class I thought I had her convinced to try it, until we got there.  As soon as we got to the front door I felt her tense up and hold on just a little tighter.  I knew in that moment that it wasn’t going to go well but I had no idea just how bad it would be.

To say it was a disaster is an understatement.  She literally cried, not quiet cries, but full on hysterical screaming through most of the class.  She didn’t participate in a single activity.  She cried for me.  She cried that she wanted to go home. She cried that didn’t want to try anymore.  At one point she had to go potty so I had to go in and take her. She was visibly shaking and kept saying over and over again “I tried mommy, I don’t like it.”  It broke my heart into a thousand pieces.

I made her stay in the class by herself the whole time.  The whole hour she cried.  The whole hour she just sat there refusing to try a single activity.  The girl is stubborn, maybe even more stubborn than me.  This was my first real tough love experience and it was a horrible, disastrous experience.  When we got out to the car Maya said in her shaky, post heavy crying voice “I didn’t have fun at gym class today. I don’t want to go to gym class next time.”, and my heart broke all over again.

I’m at a loss. I don’t know where to go from here.  The whole point of this gym class is for her to have fun, today she didn’t have fun.  Do I make her try it again next week, forcing her to go in by herself knowing it may end up being the same as this week?  Do I go back to sitting with her for the first 10-15 minutes knowing that she at least gets to enjoy most of the class that way?  I just don’t know what to do.

In the fall I was looking for an activity for Maya and decided on a gymnastics class at The Little Gym.  For the past several months we’ve been heading out every Monday morning for her gym class. She loves it, well most of it. She still won’t go into the class on her own so I have to sit with her for the first 10-15 minutes.  But, she is making progress and since she loves the class I’m okay with having to take my shoes off and sit on the floor until she’s comfortable.

Yesterday was the big grand finale class of this semester.  Her little class put on a “show”.  Basically, a demonstration of all the skills they’ve learned since the class started.  They showed off the different jumps they’ve learned, their balance beam skills, high bar skills and tumbling skills.  Watching these tiny little people, especially my little person, the tiniest one in the class, was so fun (and funny).  The whole show ended with each child being called up to receive their achievement medal.  Too cute.

Although the show started off on a rough note for Maya, she refused to participate until about half way through, she ended up having a great time and we got some great pictures of her performing her mad gymnastics skills.

The next semester starts next week. I can’t wait to see what she learns this time.  I’m hoping that she’ll be willing to go into the class all by herself (fingers crossed).

For Christmas Maya got all new Princess bedding for the big girl bed we had ordered for her.  Since the new baby will need the crib she is now using as a toddler bed we decided to get her moved into a twin bed now so she doesn’t feel like the baby is taking her bed (gotta avoid jealousy were you can!).  She was so excited about her new bedding it was hard to make her wait to use it until the new bed arrived.

You should have seen her face when the bed was finally all set up and the new princess bedding in place, pure joy.  She wanted to hop right in bed.

I don’t think I’ve ever thought she was so big and so little at the same time more than I did when I saw her laying in her new bed.  She looked so tiny in that big bed and yet seemed like such a big girl.  It reminded me of the first time she slept in her crib. She seemed so tiny for that big old thing and now here she is big enough to sleep in a twin bed.

She loves her new bed, especially since it is all decked out with princess sheets, a princess comforter and princess pillows.

When I peek in on her at night before I go to bed and see her all snuggled under her covers taking up next to no room in that big bed I wonder how I can slow time down and keep her from getting too big, too fast.