It actually kind of freaks me out a bit to see the number in the title of this post. I’m 34 weeks pregnant, I’m in my 8th month. That means there are only 6 weeks until my actual due date.  Maya arrived almost 2 weeks early so it is quite possible I have less than 6 weeks to go.  This freaks me out on more than one level. There is the obvious reason that I’m 8 months pregnant and my husband is still on the other side of the world, that is enough reason to be freaked out, don’t you think.  The other reason that seeing that big number at the top of the post and realizing how small the weeks remaining number is freaks me out is because NOTHING IS READY!! The nursery is still a guest room.  The walls have not been painted, the crib has not been brought upstairs, cleaned and set up, the other furniture is still in boxes in the garage.  And none of this stuff will be done until Lorne gets home. That goes against every fiber of my being. I’m an organized person, I like to have things done well in advance of when they need to be done. I hate procrastination.  I hate waiting to the last minute to do something.  Seeing the room so unfinished and knowing there is so little time left until this baby makes her appearance and yet I can’t do anything about it makes my head hurt.

Sanity-wise I’m a little worse for wear, but pregnancy-wise I’m still feeling really good so that helps me feel a little less worried that Baby Girl 2.0 will want to exit the comfort of my uterus before her time.  I don’t have any unmanageable symptoms.  I am 8 months pregnant and carrying around what looks like a bowling ball where my flat stomach used to be so needless to say I do have some aches and pains, but they aren’t too bad.  The worst is low back pain.  I had it with Maya too at this point in my pregnancy with her.  It is worse on days when I’ve been really busy or done a lot of bending like if I am cleaning the house or carrying Maya a lot or gardening.  It usually hits me in the evening and can make it a bit difficult to sleep. Speaking of sleeping that has also become a bit of a challenge.  I find it hard to find a position that is comfortable for any length of time, plus I have to get up to pee A LOT, so my sleep is usually in short bursts now.  Other than that I’m feeling good.  I’m getting more braxton hicks contractions now and Baby Girl 2.0 is taking up more and more space in there.  My ribs have become her new favorite kicking spot and my bladder is still her favorite punching bag. Lately she has taken to sticking her little backside out as far as she can to the point that I can feel my skin and what remains of my abdominal muscles stretching painfully to their brink. if she pushes her butt out any further she’ll pop right out I think

I had an appointment with my obstetrician last week.  It went really well.  My weight, blood pressure and tummy size all looked great.  The baby’s heart beat sounded great.  All in all things are progressing very well.  We spent most of the appointment revisiting a topic we had discussed earlier in my pregnancy, whether or not I can deliver vaginally again or if a c-section will be necessary.  Since I had such major tearing with Maya followed by hemorraging and the need for surgical repair of the tears a week after she was born, my previous OB (my current OBs former partner) had mentioned that a c-section may be necessary with any subsequent deliveries.  My current OB, early on in this pregnancy, had reviewed all the notes from my pregnancy, delivery and post partum complications with Maya and was of the opinion that I would likely be able to delivery vaginally if that is what I wanted to do.  He did say we would have to look at a few things later in the pregnancy before a final decision could be made.  Well, now is the time to revisit that question.  Over the next several weeks he will be investigating a few things including the extent of the scar tissue build up around the tear sites and the size of this baby and will give me his professional opinion based on the results of those tests.  Next week at my appointment he’ll do an internal exam to check for scar tissue.  If there is a lot of scar tissue build up than I’ll probably have to have a c-section.  The following week they will perform a growth ultrasound on the baby to determine her approximate size.  As long as it looks like she would be right around Maya’s birth weight (7lbs 10oz) or smaller than delivering vaginally shouldn’t be a problem. So it all boils down to how big this kiddo is and how much scar tissue I have around the tear sites.

He advised me that ultimately the decision is mine, all he can do is give me his best professional opinion and guide me in my decision based on what is going on with my body and the baby.  I do not want to have a c-section if I can avoid it.  I’ve had abdominal surgery before and the recovery was no picnic.  I don’t want to have to go through the recovery of a c-section when I have a new baby to care for and a 3 year old who is going to want her whole mommy, not a mommy that can’t pick her up or play with her as much, etc.  What I went through when Maya was born was scary, but in all likelihood that would not happen again if everything in the next couple of weeks checks out.  Internal tears heal much faster and are much more forgiving than external tears.  As long as my body healed properly and well (not too much scar tissue) and this baby isn’t looking like she’ll be above average weight wise than I am bound and determined to at least attempt a vaginal delivery.  But, I’m not going to risk myself or this baby, so if my doctor’s opinion ends up being that a c-section is a wiser choice for me, that is what we’ll go with.

The next few weeks are going to be filled with a lot of information and I’ll have some big decisions to make.  In the meantime I’m just going to keep enjoying this pregnancy and the time I have with this squirmy little princess before she decides it is time to meet the rest of the world.