Parenting a second child is quite a bit different than parenting a first child. I’m find things so different as a second time mom. Not just because each child is different and requires a different parenting approach, but because I’m coming at this with almost 4 years of parenting experience under my belt and my perspective is very different this time around. Many things about parenting a new baby are so much easier this time around.

One of the very first things I noticed about parenting my second child versus my first child was that I was so much calmer, so much more relaxed right out of the gate. I knew from experience not to let early breastfeeding challenges get the better of me. I knew what to expect when it came to sleep deprivation. I didn’t fuss over the little things. From the moment Anna was placed in my arms I was comfortable and knew everything was going to be just fine. Breastfeeding would work out, first baths would be a breeze, and sleep would come eventually. My perspective was so different thanks to the experience and knowledge I gained the first time around.

First babies are the guinea pigs, the learning babies, the ones we are so afraid to mess up with. Second babies are so much easier because we’ve learned that we don’t have to be perfect we just have to the right parent for our child and do things the way that works best for our child. Second babies get the benefit of all that trial and error, all those mistakes and corrections, all those weeks and months of needless worrying before we realize it isn’t worth sweating the small stuff.

A few weeks ago I was sitting here on the couch cutting Anna’s finger nails and I turned to Lorne and said “Remember how nervous I was with Maya about cutting her fingers nails” and I laughed. I remember biting her finger nails for the first few months because  didn’t want to accidentally cut her finger with the nail clippers. This time around I feel like a nail cutting pro and have used the clippers from the very beginning with out incident. I wasn’t nervous and I knew immediately it wasn’t worth worrying about.

It is amazing the silly, small things that cause us such great strife with our first children. Things like nail cutting, first baths, diaper changes, dressing a tiny, wiggly baby. I remember, vaguely, the nerves those first few months with Maya. I remember reading a lot parenting websites and books trying to make sure I was doing everything right. Eventually I grew into my parenting shoes and knew that as long as I was making decisions and doing things that were best for Maya I couldn’t really go wrong. I learned to ignore other people’s advice and opinions because it wasn’t about what other people thought or did, it was about what worked for my child and for me. I learned to be the best mom I could be. Anna now gets to benefit from that. This time around I feel like an old pro and I don’t sweat the small stuff, it isn’t worth it. There are too many wonderful things to take in and enjoy to worry about cutting a tiny little fingernail.

So far she seems to like the mom she ended up with