Or, subscribe via email
Supporting
In the early part of pregnancy the idea that a small little person is growing inside of you can be difficult to imagine. The baby inside is still very surreal. You can’t see him or her (unless you have an ultrasound, of course), you can’t touch him or her and you can’t yet feel him or her moving inside of you. Hearing the baby’s heartbeat at a prenatal visit or seeing his or her fuzzy image on an ultrasound monitor are your only real glimpses of the life being created. Feeling your baby move for the first time is such a magical time of pregnancy. It is those first faint kicks, those little flutters that tell you someone is in there. Those little flutters that will become large, sometimes uncomfortable kicks, are your connection to the baby.
When you feel those first faint movements will vary widely from woman to woman and even from pregnancy to pregnancy. Often times women will be able to recognize the faint flutters of movement earlier in second and subsequent pregnancies since they already know what to look for. On average a pregnant woman can expect to feel her baby moving sometime around the 15 to 20 weeks of pregnancy. The baby begins moving as early as 7-8 weeks but since it is still so tiny at that point you won’t yet be able to feel the movements. Your size can also impact when you feel the first movements. Larger women often don’t feel the first movements until closer to the 20th week of pregnancy or later. While petite women may feel the baby move earlier. When I was pregnant with Maya I felt her move for the first time during my 14th week of pregnancy. It felt like tiny little flutters, sort of like popcorn popping inside my tummy. It is definitely a very cool feeling.
As the baby continues to grow and take up more space inside your abdomen you will begin to feel stronger more regular kicks. You’ll begin to recognize your baby’s cycles. There will be certain times of the day when the baby is very active, like just after you’ve eaten or when you are relaxing or trying to sleep. Other times of the day the baby will be very still. Recognizing these patterns will help you identify if something is wrong. If you haven’t felt the baby move at his or her regular times you’ll know to call your doctor. A general role of thumb for fetal movements is at least 10 distinct movements in no more than 2 hours. You don’t need to constantly count the movements but occasionally, during a regular active time for your baby, sit quietly or lay on your side and time how long it takes to feel 10 movements. Call your doctor if you do not feel 10 movements in 2 hours.
Feeling those movements, even though they can sometimes be uncomfortable or keep you awake at night, is the best feeling. Those little hands and feet moving away inside giving you a glimpse of the person you will meet on delivery day. Enjoy those kicks, they are definitely one of the things you will miss about being pregnant.
Be sure to talk to your doctor if you are at all concerned about your baby’s movements.
One thing I’ve learned about toddlers from my brief stint as the mother of one is that they don’t really like change all that much. Routines and repetition are the name of the game for toddlers. They like to know when to expect certain things like naps and lunch and snacks, etc. So, packing up and moving to a new house with a toddler can be a challenge.
We just moved last week and things seem to be going pretty well so far. There were several things that I did to help make Maya feel part of the move and prepared for the big day when we actual moved into the new house. I figured if she knew what to expect along the way and felt like she was part of the action than things would go a little smoother, and they did.
Here are a few things you can do with your toddler as you prepare to move into a new home:
- Bring your child along to look at the homes with you as you are searching for a new home to buy.
- Be sure you see the house you will be buying several times with your toddler in tow.
- Let your toddler explore the new house and talk about all the fun things about the house like where their room is going to be, how fun it will be to play in the new backyard, etc.
- As you pack up your home get your child involved. Talk about all the things that will come with you to the new house and let your child pack up their own toys so they are comfortable with the fact that none of their stuff will be left behind.
- Get some books about moving. We read The Berenstain Bears Moving Day a lot in the weeks leading up to our move. Reading and seeing pictures in books about moving will help your child better understand what to expect.
- Talk a lot about the move and what your child can expect. Let them ask questions.
- On moving day let your child be as involved as possible. Give them little things to carry into the new house and let them help unpack some boxes and put things away.
- Allow for an adjustment period. Sleeping habits may take a while to adjust in the new house. Also, your child’s temperament may be a little different for a few days or so after you move in.
When your child feels part of what is going on and has a bit of an understanding about what to expect during the moving process it is more likely they will adjust to their new surrounding faster and may even be excited about the move.
The one thing that my daughter didn’t quite understand was that the new house was home now and not our old house. For several days after we moved she would ask to go home when she was really tired. She didn’t quite understand that we were home and this was where we were going to sleep now. After a few days though, she seems to be into the swing of things and definitely loves her new house and new bedroom.
When you moved how did you help your children adjust to their new surroundings?
Today’s guest post comes to you from a very dear friend of mine, Heather. Currently Heather can be found on her blog Life Through Heather’s Lens where she chronicles her adventures with her two darling children through photos (and some stories). She used to blog over at Riding the Short Bus where she could be counted on to always have a hysterical story to share.
I’ve known Heather for, I guess about 4 years now. We used to work together in what we lovingly refer to as HELL, and are now stay-home-mom buddies together. One of the things I learned about Heather very early on was that Heather has a way with words and can tell a story like nobody’s business. When she finally started blogging I was so excited, because I knew it would be a fabulous read, and I was right. However, when Heather started caring for “The Others” she stopped blogging (when you read her post you’ll understand why). Even though I get to hear all her stories in person I still missed reading her blog. I was happy to give her the opportunity to do a little writing again. Without further ado I had the floor (or blog) over to Heather, enjoy 
A little over a year ago I basically walked off my job, my career of 10 years, to stay at home with my two children, then ages four and one. That sounds way more dramatic than what it actually was. I hated that office and all the unrelenting, back-stabbing politicking that came with it. I knew I would never miss it for a day. The big question was: Now what?
I had crunched the numbers and the numbers were grim. Sure, it was doable… if by doable you mean spending exactly $100 a week on groceries for a family of four, cutting out most activities that involved entrance fees, dues, and/or gear, never getting sick and having a doctor’s bill larger than a co-pay, and avoiding the ultimate worst tragedy: never, and I mean NEVER, allowing a car to break down.
But I was a girl used to decent dual incomes and the lifestyle that accommodated. I wasn’t sure I could live under such tight budgetary constraints. Having neither the sales presence to enlist in AVON nor the creativity to start my own home based business, I decided to try and make money at what I was leaving work to do anyway – caring for children.
Sadly, I didn’t have any friends or even acquaintances who were in the market for childcare at the time. Knowing nowhere else to turn, I printed up flyers and distributed them around my neighborhood, and put an ad on Craigslist. The flyers generated zero in the way of phone calls, but the ad I put on Craigslist generated a few calls and emails per week. I started scheduling interviews. Things were looking up, and quickly. My husband went from sweating bullets to perspiring mere raindrops. My fingers, wrapped tightly around my debit card, started to unclench. These people must be crazy, I thought, to trust me – ME – no experience with other children, no background in nursing or early childhood education, really no idea what the heck I’m doing ME to take care of their children full time!
And what is it they say about instinct? That you should listen to it? Because when you start thinking people might be a little nutty, chances are fair that your gut is in fact trying to tell you something. So when The Others showed up, proclaiming that their eldest child, age three, was “ALL BOY” and “likes to stay busy,” perhaps I could have gleaned from that conversation “our child has ADHD and will drive you constantly crazy with his incessant need for your attention which will include, but not limit itself to, Olympic-caliber couch jumping, artistic development of your drywall via chiseling, spontaneous removal of curtain rods and works of art from your walls, and the complete saturation of your son’s bedroom…in urine, all the while never ceasing from calling your name no less than 90 times per minute and bombarding you with the same question at least 400 times an hour.”
It’s been over a year now since I took on The Others. In one way I am grateful. They took a chance on me and made up just enough of the gap of my paycheck that our lifestyle hasn’t suffered much. In another way……I’m freaking exhausted. Ten hours of daily ADHD daycare plus All Boy’s infant sister, not to mention taking care of my own two (fairly) normal children, have completely zapped my energy and patience by 5 p.m. and I have almost nothing left to give my own family at the end of the day. From 5:00 on Friday to the time I go to bed on Sunday I am dreading and fretting over Monday morning. I recently asked my doctor for “happy pills.” If there were such a thing as “energy pills” I’d have asked for those, too. The light at the end of this tunnel is that All Boy will be leaving me in August for a full-time professional daycare, which will be a better fit for him. I get to keep Lil Sis, and who knows – without All Boy around to steal the spotlight, I might actually enjoy her.
The big question: would I do it again? Absolutely. What wouldn’t a mother do for her family? If I’d had more time to work things out, I would have been a bit more selective in the children I chose to bring into my home. Live and learn, I always say…….um, is it August yet?