Recently I read this article on MSNBC discussing our society’s increasing intolerance of children. I found it rather interesting. According to this article, increasingly we as a society are expecting children to be quiet and well behaved in public, at all times with no exceptions. We get upset when children are present in fancier restaurants, movie theatres, and museums. We seem to have gone back to that whole “a child should be seen and not heard” idea.

I think the problem boils down a couple of things.

First, there seems to be this increasing expectation for children to behave as miniature adults. We expect children to be able to know the difference between a fancy restaurant and a family restaurant. We expect them to understand the importance of being quiet when in certain places and situations. We no longer seem to see a kid as a kid. Children aren’t miniature adults, they are kids learning as they go along how to behave, what is expected of them, and the difference between right and wrong.

Secondly, parents seem to be part of the problem. Some parents seem to have this idea in their heads that their children will just naturally know how to behave in all situations. They assume a child can sit quietly and still for the hour or so it takes for the family to eat at a nice restaurant, or even worse, sit quietly during a movie that is 2 hours or more. Children learn from experience and from observation how to act in a given situation. They will not likely know at age 2 what is expected in a quiet restaurant setting, or at age 6 how to sit through a long movie (especially one that is not a cartoon).

As a society we seem to have become much less patient, especially when it comes to children. I admit that sometimes I am guilty of this. I have found myself sitting in a restaurant next to a family and think, “can’t they control their kids; we are trying to have a nice meal.” We seem to expect children to be on their best behavior at all times, when adults can’t even abide by that rule. Kids will be kids, and we need to develop more understanding and patience. Yes, sometimes kids are behaving badly in places they probably shouldn’t be in the first place, but we can’t change everything. What we can change is how we react.

What are your thoughts? Have your ever found yourself being intolerant, or being on the receiving end of intolerance when you have been out with your kids?